We live in a noisy, filtered, digital world that can often cause us to compare ourselves to others around us and sometimes, this can lead to negative self-talk and a destructive self-image. Sometimes it can just take one small thing to trigger you and throw you off balance completely, before you start to self-sabotage and even question your identity. Before you know it, you are sheltering yourself from the outside world, binge-watching Netflix and have overindulged in junk food. Let’s be real, where does that get us? Usually, these mind-numbing activities lead us to a path of guilt and shame and push us further away from accomplishing our goals.
I recently conducted a customer discovery survey for my business. One of the survey questions was:
What do you believe is the biggest thing in your life that limits you from where you are now to where you want to be?
The #1 answer was: Myself. Many of the responses went into more detail about how they struggle with negative self-talk; which leads to anxiety, low self-confidence, which impacts the way they feel and operate day to day and ultimately influences their results.
For years I struggled with anxiety, self-sabotaging thoughts and depression. In 2014, after the sudden passing of my Father, I hit rock bottom. After a few months, I decided enough was enough. I completely submerged myself in the personal development world, cut out toxic people who didn’t want what was best for me, and decided to level up. I’ve been on a wild journey of studying mindset and self-development, which has allowed me to attract some pretty amazing mentors and thought leaders into my life, including Bob Proctor, one of the most excellent prosperity teachers from the film The Secret.
This journey has indeed led me to reshape my self-image and see myself for who I truly am. Whenever I catch myself feeling low, I resort to these three guidelines. I hope they help you as much as they do for me.
Feel Good Now Checklist ✔️
1) Be intentional with what you feed your mind
Our subconscious minds are extremely powerful and dynamic. A mentor of mine once told me to view our subconscious minds like a garden. The seeds you plant will determine what it grows.
A few questions to help out with this are:
What’s the first thing you listen to in the morning?
What is your environment like? (Work, Home and Fun)
What kind of books are you reading?
Are you spending time watching reality tv or listening to a podcast that will lift your spirits?
All of these factors will impact the way you think and feel. So honestly, ask yourself, are you planting fruitful seeds in your garden or toxic weeds?
2) Make time for yourself To “Be”
Often, we feel overwhelmed and start second-guessing our decisions because we are thinking too far ahead into the future and getting ahead of ourselves. There’s a quote by Esther Hicks that reads, “You can’t get it wrong, and you’ll never get it done.” When we make a point to surrender to everything that is stressing us out and take time to just “be,” we are at ease and back into alignment before we know it. At that point, everything feels lighter, and you can proceed with your daily priorities in a positive-minded state.
3) Treat Yourself!
As a millennial Entrepreneur, I completely understand what it’s like to forget to make time for self-care. Sometimes it’s easy to fall into the trap of working long hours and not do something nice for ourselves. Let’s get one thing clear if 2020 & 2021 has taught us anything; it’s this: Self-Care is a top priority! So, what makes you feel good? Maybe it’s going to get your nails done at your favourite place, having a hot bubble bath, meditating, or dressing up in beautiful clothes and cooking your favourite meal - whatever it is, make time for it. Period. If you don’t make the time to nourish yourself, it’ll be tough to do much of anything else.
You always know in your heart what you need for yourself. Listen to your soul, it wants what’s best for you. I challenge you today to make a conscious decision that you are going to feed your mind with all the good things. Surround yourself with those that lift you higher. Treat yourself like the magnificent being that you are and decide to feel good now!
My name is Melissa Pauli-Cardoso. I help open-minded, motivated individuals that value health, vitality and personal growth to design their desired lifestyle from anywhere globally. Follow my journey and connect with me on Instagram @melissajpauli Email: firstname.lastname@example.org